I am writing this recipe as it cooks in the oven. It is completely experimental and I have no clue how it is going to turn out. This is going to be a very imprecise recipe, but it is already smelling, like, the entire block up with beer cheese and butternut squash and I am *incredibly* hungry.
- Hunk of Muenster cheese
- Hunk of sharp cheddar cheese (Boxing Day Cheddar)
- Bottle of Fat Tire beer
- Parmesan cheese
- A small butternut squash, or in my case, a large one cut in half, diced
- A box of medium shell macaroni
- Oregano, to taste
- Rosemary, to taste
- Marjoram, to taste
- Salt, a dash
1. OK, go ahead and heat the oven to 375. Now crack open the Fat Tire because it’s Wednesday and wow, Fat Tire is delicious everytime. While the oven is heating up, dice the small butternut squash, and throw it in with enough water to cover it mostly, the oregano, rosemary and marjoram. Cook this at medium-high heat until the squash is tender. At the same time, boil a pot of water and throw the medium shells in with a dash of salt.
2. Once the noodles are done, strain them and set them aside in a bowl. Once the squash is done, go ahead and mash it up while in the bowl still, and then combine it with the noodles. At this stage it should look vaguely appetizing.
3. Now, take more water and flour and make a roux in whatever free pot you have available. This part needs continuous stirring to stop checking Facebook. Add in some milk until it is starting to foam and grow, now add in the beer and the cheese (again, stirring continuously) until it is a good cheese sauce. It should smell like you want to bathe your entire body in it.
4. Your bottle of Fat Tire should be gone by now, so crack open a second one.
5. Once the cheese sauce has simmered down a bit (10 minutes on high, stirring the entire time), take the squash/macaroni mixture and mix it all together, still on high heat. Now take it and put it in a baking pan, putting a layer of Parmesan cheese on top (not a thick layer, just enough for flavor). Now put an aluminum covering on it and throw it in the oven.
6. About 15 minutes later, take the aluminum covering off and let the top with the Parmesan get nice and brown. Take it out, serve it to your family/partner who has NOT helped and assign them dishes instead, because I used, like, all my dishes to cook this.
Foolishly, I offered to host Thanksgiving this year, and then remembered that I only have cursory cooking skills (not anywhere on par with my old roommate, Cody). But the family breathed a sigh of relief, and it’s at least easy to get to my house (as compared to my parents’ place).
Here’s the menu:
Turkey, purchased at Trader Joe’s, and pre-brined. I will probably brine it again
Gravy, made from the turkey drippings and scraps
Yam Casserole with pecans
Green Bean Casserole (the classic on the side of the fried onion cans)
Bread (cheating here, and buying it from Cub)
Pork tenderloin (they cut into nice, tasty medallions)
Pumpkin & mincemeat pie (made by Mom)
We’ll see how this goes. I’m cooking for 10 individuals, and this is going to be an adventure. Photos forthcoming!